Ok well today has been a rather odd day I must say, its been filled with highs and lows. Which is odd because I haven't had a day like that in quite some time. It started off like every Sunday morning starts off for me which is lovely church, which was a high point of the day as I love going to Jubilee! and obviously I love worshipping God and learning more about him. Then we went onto Coombs farm to stroke the lambs and laugh at the sheeps making hilarious noises and we also went on a tractor ride which was very cold and windy but fun.
Then I got home and suddenly had a low and I dont know why! it was really weird I just started to think about how I talk and how annoying it might be to have to listen to me! I dont know why I started to think this but I did. I came to the conclusion that I talk before I really think about what I am trying to say which then means I often dont make sense and I start making a fool out of myself and this got me really angry and upset. I often say stupid things, and I laugh them off but today I was thinking over some of the stupid things I say and nearly started to cry, rather bizarre. Then that got me even more annoyed and upset because then I started thinking 'oh maddy, your just to emotional and sensitive, get a grip'.
So anyway after this low point I decided that I would go to seeking God even though I wasn't really in the mood as I felt like I just want to curl up in bed a cry (i really really dont know why I felt like this) but I headed down there anyway. Which I must say was a very good decision as it was one of the best prayer meetings I have been to. God was talking to us all so much and I went from wanting to cry and practically doing it to feeling this amazing amount of Joy and praise in a matter of seconds! wow! I really really do love God he truely is amazing. This eve just reminded me once again that no matter what happens in our lives good, bad or scary that as long as we have God in our lives we never need to worry. He fills us up and gives us strength and if we have faith in him for what tommorow brings then all are fears will slowely fade away. Praise God eh?
Anyway just thought I would share my day with you all, best go to sleep I guess got work tommorow. night night x
2 comments:
Maddy I flippin love you! And you're right, you do say silly things sometimes... but who doesn't! I know how it feels though to beat yourself up over such stuff and still can't advise you on how to not! (still working it out for myself!) But I did have a distinct realisation yeasterday of how God looks at us. He loves your heart, the words don't have to be spot on! We're being sanctified, I've realised that God doesn't actually want us to TRY to be perfect, but we're on our way by HIS grace! So that no one can boast! (Eph2) I hope that helps a little. God is Sovereign and as we're his children he sees straght past all our funny quirks and habits and loves us unconditionally. He delights in the fact that we're all so amazingly different. I love you too! x Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you (1Peter5.7) xx X (TS to top it off!)
I have discovered that analysing the things you say can be a very bad and dangereous thing and i frequently get very annoyed with myself over the completely idiotical things i say... it is infact one of my biggest issues! ha ha!...
however, i would like to tell you that even though Deb says you say some silly things, i have never actually heard you say any... i admire the ability you have to say good and encouraging and senstive things... if only i could speak like you do.....
lots of love becky x x
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